SHORT STORIES FRIDAYS (36)

COMICAL HAUNTING

Sagar Deshpandey and his wife, Anamika, stepped inside their new villa in Lonavala, a scenic hill station near Mumbai. It was fully furnished and comprised of four rooms on the ground floor and three rooms on the first floor with a terrace. They could not believe their luck, when their real estate agent helped them to seal a deal at an affordable price. Little did they know that along with the furniture, they also had ghosts as the residents. The ghost couple, Makrand and Sumitra Patil, were irked to find their house being invaded by two strangers.

They wanted to get rid of them. They decided to wait until midnight and unleash a reign of terror with their scare tactics. Sagar helped his wife with unpacking and arranging things in order. They had their food in a nearby restaurant. By the time, they came back , they were too tired and called it a day. A storm was brewing up and the ghosts decided to take advantage of the fact.

Sagar and his wife went to bed early that night. A gust of wind blew, rattling the windows in the process. Makrand entered the room through the wall. He made a howling sound to wake Sagar. Anamika murmured, ” Sagar, I hear some weird noises.” Sagar replied, ” Go back to sleep, Anu. It’s probably a harmless dog howling.” Makrand was furious while his wife, Sumitra, giggled as she heard the comment. She said, ” I like this guy. He called you a harmless dog. I knew you could not scare even a mosquito. Some ghost you are! ” She attempted to glide over Sagar when he let out a huge stinking fart. Now, Makrand roared with laughter and said, ” At least, he compared me to a dog. What about you? You are a stinking fart.” Sumitra grumbled, ” I guess he stuffed himself with Mooli ( radish) parathas. I pity this woman. How could she marry a guy with a serious gas problem? ” Makrand and Sumitra made their way out, having a typical husband-wife argument.

The next day, Sagar was busy reading a newspaper, when he noticed a transparent human like material floating towards him. He glanced at him. Makrand let out a typical ghostly laugh. Sagar smiled back. Makrand was shocked. He hadn’t expected this kind of reaction. He tried to threaten him and said, ” Leave this house at once, if you value your life. Or I will be forced to kill you.” Sagar replied, ” Please kill me by all means. I am fed up of living with a monster for the past 15 years. So, a ghost doesn’t scare me.”

Makrand commented, ” You aren’t supposed to react like this. You should say ” God save me and run.” Just then Anamika called from the kitchen, ” Who are you talking to, Sagar? ” Sagar replied, ” Your father. He’s here to bless us.” His wife replied, ” Don’t talk nonsense. How can my father be here when he’s in the USA? ” She came out of the kitchen and saw Makrand’s ghost. Instead of screaming in fear, she seemed to be pleased. ” Oh, Good! I see you have hired a servant. But why’s he looking like a ghost? Wait a minute, he’s a ghost. How dare you call my father a ghost? “
Sagar answered, ” Had your father been an angel, you would look like one!” Makrand was watching this banter in amusement. Sagar continued, ” This poor guy doesn’t know how to scare anyone. Let me show him.” He took out his phone and asked Makrand to come over and have a look. Makrand screamed at the pic. It was Anamika without her makeup. Makrand said, ” Had I not been dead, this pic would have given me a heart attack. Great bro. You do have a spooky wife.” Anamika lost her temper on being insulted.

Anamika hurled a rolling pin at Sagar’s head and it hit the bulls eye. Makrand clapped and said, ” Fantastic aim. Do keep going.” Anamika glared at the ghost and said, ” Just shut up and start sweeping the floor, ghostly servant.” Just then, Makrand’s wife, Sumitra floated over Anamika’s head and yelled at her, ” How dare you call my husband a servant? No one dares to treat him like a servant, except for me and get away with it. Both of you leave at once or I will have you killed.” Anamika yelled back, ” Don’t you dare challenge me Or I will let my husband loose on you. You don’t have any idea of the power of his stinking fart.” Sumitra became silent while Makrand was overjoyed to see his wife being tamed.

She flew away and carried a mug of water with her that she deliberately dropped on Anamika. The latter looked like a drowned rat and Sagar and Makrand burst out laughing. Sumitra winked at Sagar and said, ” Don’t just stand there. Click her picture and post it on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. Serves her right for ill treating her husband and trying to dominate mine.” ” Please don’t upload my pic, ” pleaded Anamika, ” I promise not to yell at or fight with you, Sagar. I won’t even torture you for shopping.”

Sagar felt as if he had won a lottery. ” Thank you so much, dear friends, ” he said, ” We didn’t introduce ourselves. I am Sagar Deshpandey and this is my wife, Anamika. ” Makrand smiled and said, ” I am Makrand Patil and this is my wife Sumitra. This was our home prior to our death.” Sagar asked, ” If you don’t mind, would you please tell me how you died?” Makrand stopped smiling while Sumitra continued grinning. She said, ” One day, I slipped and fell in the bathroom. This guy laughed at me. I slapped him so hard that he died on the spot. We had taken a huge insurance policy on his life. While I regretted his untimely demise, I was happy to know that I would be getting a cheque of 30 lakhs. I forgot that I was still in the bathroom and did a stupid dance. I fell once again, hitting my head against the tap and died.”

Sagar and Anamika looked at each other and tried to hold back their laughter. He said, ” Listen guys! I like you both. I won’t evict you from your home. But promise to put on your best behavior and occupy your favorite room without bothering us. Otherwise, I would be prompted to share the comical story of your deaths over the social media.” The ghost couple looked terrified but promised to follow his instructions as his wife now looked at him, admiringly. ( The ghosts in this story are poltergeists).

Thank you so much for taking your precious time to visit my website. Hope you enjoyed reading my blogs. 😊😊