PERFECT HUMANS : ERROR 404 NOT FOUND.
When I first applied for my voter ID, I had no idea that I was about to have a massive heart attack. At first, I laughed at the Voter ID and said, ” The Government has started issuing voter IDs to Gorillas and Chimpanzees.”
My mom intervened and added, “Look carefully, it’s your own Voter ID.” I was too shocked to respond. I know I am not Miss Photogenic or a beauty queen but hey! I don’t look like a ghost or an ape. I wanted to personally strangle the idiotic photographer for completely blackening my face. I only had two white slits for my eyes. Even aliens would scared by the photo.
Then, I got married and updated my Voter ID with a change of address. This time, my photo was perfect but they murdered my name from Aparna to Abarna. I had enough of this nonsense. Who employed these geniuses ( read idiots)? I had filled my name in capital in the application. This is nothing compared to what my brother-in-law and sister-in-law went through. The closest relative of Shri Albert Einstein chose to mismatch the name with their respective photographs. Now, their Voter IDs had a female name to a male pic and a male name to the female pic. God, where were You when these geniuses were being created?
Now, let’s share and enjoy human stupidity which has no limit. I came across some funny conversation published in the local newspaper when I was 10 or 11. The reason I remember them is because of the genuine idiocy reflected in it. We act foolishly at times, don’t even realize it and are proud of our idiocy.
- Hum subah subah morning walk ko jaate hain. It means we go for a morning walk in the morning. Who the hell goes for a morning walk at night? 😂😂😂😂😂 The speaker deserves an award for his sense of humor.
- Woh neeche wale ground floor me rehta hai. It means he lives on the lower ground floor. What do you mean by lower ground floor? Ground floor itself means on the ground. There’s no such thing as upper and lower ground floor. It has to be first floor or the basement. 😂😂😂😂😂
- You can stay with us for as long as you like for two days. ( This is taken from the Hindi comedy series ‘ Khichdi’ spoken by a funny lady character Jaishree Parekh)
- I have two daughters. Both are girls.
- A teacher was asking his students to be quiet and said, ” Shush, Children! Don’t make any noise. The principal is revolving around the school.” He meant to say that the principal was on the rounds.
- Another genius teacher yelled at a couple of students and said, ” Both of you three get out of the class.”
- A Physical Education Teacher was instructing his students to stand in a straight circle.
- Two friends had a major argument. A passerby decided to intervene and prevent the fight from escalating. One of the friends was poor in English but wanted to impress the others. He said, ” I talk. He talk. Why you middle middle talk? ” He meant to ask why the third person was interfering in their argument. 😀😀😀😀😀😀
- There was a candidate who was asked to write an essay on cow. He wrote: “He is a cow. He has four legs, two horns, two eyes, a big tongue and a tail to fight the mosquitoes. He has four taps attached to the bottom of the stomach, ( udder) , from which we get milk.” The examiner must be in coma after reading this gross murder of English. 😄😄😄😄
- Open the window and let the atmosphere come in. 😃😃😃😃😃😃
And now a childhood memory.
This is my school photo taken in the third grade. Any guesses, where I am?
Fourth from the right on the topmost row.
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